Make Your Kids Listen

Effective Ways to Talk to Your Kids to Make Them Listen


The way you talk to your kids greatly impacts their cognitive and emotional development. The manner of your speaking when you’re talking to them shows them how you want them to speak back to you. So, if you want your kids to listen and be a courteous speaker later on, here are a few tips for improving the way you communicate with your children.


  1. Use your child’s name more often

Your name is music to your ears, and your kids are no different to that. Plus, it helps get their attention before saying what you want to say. For example, “Sam, please get the remote.” Younger children can usually concentrate on one thing at a time, so it would be better to call their name first until you have their full attention before delivering your message. For example, “Grace (pause and wait until she looks at you), dinner is ready. Let’s eat.”

  1. Talk to them in a positive manner

Try not to use words like “no” or “don’t.” Instead, say something that corrects the action you don’t want them to do. For instance, instead of saying “No running inside the house,” try saying “Only walking inside, please.” While this requires practice and a bit of conscious effort on your part, it will all be worth it later on.


  1. Give them choices

When you want your children to listen to you, give them the authority to be in-charge by providing them with options and letting them choose. For example, “Which homework do you want to do first, English or Math?” By letting her choose between subjects, you make your child feel as if she has choices, even though there’s really no room for negotiation whether to play or do her homework first.

  1. Be a good role model to your children

If you show good manners at home, your children will see how being good is done and will eventually follow them. Start with the basics, like saying “please” and “thank you.” Your children deserve the same courtesy that adults use with each other, so make sure to use such words before and after asking favours.

  1. Be gentle, but firm with your decisions

If you need to make a decision, talk with your partner and agree on it. Your kids may not like the decision you made, but they know it’s irrevocable and will not bother persisting or playing one parent off against the other.

Just like when we’re talking to our friends, talking to our children requires conscious effort in making sure that we are heard and understood in the right way. Since we want our kids to grow as respectful adults, while also developing a close relationship with them, it’s important to be mindful with our actions and the things we say to them.


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